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Divorce with Dignity...

Without the emotional and financial burdens of a court battle

What is mediation?


Mediation is one of the most frequently used methods of negotiating a divorce settlement. In divorce mediation, you and your spouse -- or, in some cases, the two of you and your respective lawyers -- hire a neutral third party, called a mediator, to meet with you in an effort to discuss and resolve the issues in your divorce. The mediator doesn't make decisions for you, but serves as a facilitator to help you and your spouse figure out what's best. 


All that's required to make a divorce mediation successful is for both people to show up willing to negotiate and open to compromise. Don't reject mediation just because you and your spouse see a particular issue very differently; Mediation is a powerful process and many cases that seem impossible to resolve at the beginning end up in a settlement if everyone is committed to the process.

How can mediation help me?


Mediation can work for almost all couples-- and has a long list of benefits.

  • Mediation is much less expensive than going to court.

  • Most mediations end in a settlement of the issues in your divorce.

  • Mediation is confidential, with no public record of what goes on in your sessions. Connecticut law states that no one can use what is said in mediation as evidence in court. 

  • Mediation allows you to arrive at a resolution based on your own ideas of what's fair in your situation, rather than having a solution imposed upon you based on rigid and impersonal legal principles.

  • You can still have a lawyer give you legal advice if you wish.

  • You and your spouse, not the court, can control the process.

  • The mediation process can improve communication between you and your spouse, helping you avoid future conflicts.

What does a mediator do?


A mediator is a neutral third party who helps couples resolve the issues in their divorce. At Bakes Law, LLC, our mediator helps identify the issues needed to be discussed and the order in which they will be discussed. Our mediator facilitates the communication between the parties by making sure each party is given an uninterrupted time to speak, asking a party to restate or explain a point when necessary, and asking questions to make communication clear.


Our mediator also provides information about the legal system, how issues may be viewed by lawyers or judges, and what alternatives there are for solving issues. At the mediation sessions, the conversations revolve around how to compromise on various issues in order to meet the needs of both parties. 


How long does it take? What's the cost?


Mediation is almost always faster than going through divorce court. Every case is different, but the average case usually takes at least three to four two-hour mediation sessions, spread out over at least a month or two. More complex cases can take four to six months to complete. The complexity of the issues and ability of the individuals to be flexible as they negotiate a fair agreement determines the length of the mediation. 


Typical divorce costs can run two to ten times higher than the mediation cost. In a typical case, parties can expect to pay a combined total of between $3,000 to $5,000 for cases needing three to five mediation sessions. Also, keep in mind that "cost" not only means dollars spent but the emotional cost to the parties and their children who go through litigated divorces. This emotional cost is greatly reduced by the mediation process.


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